Surviving Lunch & Thank You

Well I did it. I survived lunch. I’m so frustrated with myself its so hard to put it into words. Yes, I made it through lunch but it should be something to enjoy. Time with my family. Not something to endure. I knew I was going to be nervous because I had talked myself into it before even going.

Upon arriving I felt out of it. A bit off balance. I just wanted to get back in the car and drive home but I didn’t. I had lunch. I talked with family. However, I couldn’t eat that much, I can’t eat when I’m nervous. I didn’t enjoy it as much as I could. Worried about feeling “weird”, feeling “not there”, can’t really explain it but its a scary feeling.

You know, it makes me feel less than human to not be able to enjoy such simple things like eating a meal in a restaurant.

OK, that experience is in the past. I want to give a sincere thank you for all of those who visit my blog and for those of you that comment and share your thoughts. It means so much to me to know that there are others out there that understand. It makes me feel not so alone, not so scared about being in a dark and isolated place.